NPC Based Merits

"Allies, Mentors, Retainers and similar Merit-based NPCs are created and portrayed by the Storyteller." 

- Mind's Eye Society Universal Addenda


A recent development came up as the new chronicle rolled in, it has a lot to do with the discussions I posted previously about NPCs and how they should be handled by the STs. The ST chain of the Mind's Eye Society has made a point of stressing that the NPC based Merits. For those of you who do not play in the New World of Darkness Games, Merits are defined in the corebook as "Merit: A character trait representing enhancements or elements of a character’s background, such as his allies or influence." So when I say NPC Based Merits, I mean items that tie a PC to a character inside the setting. They come in different flavors:

1) Mentor: A teacher and guide to the PC. Mentors often take the tack of teaching through subtle means, Daniel LaRusso had Miyagi on his sheet. The Mentor acts as teacher, though the caveat of agenda of their own is always on the table.

2) Contacts: A bit more passive than the other merits. Contacts give information, but not much else, they can be anywhere from a group, a demographic or a single person in the know.

3) Allies: More active versions of Contacts, Allies allows you to gain assistance in a certain area (multiple purchases means multiple areas). You can have Allies in Streetgangs, Allies in the Police, and if you ask for favors that are in their area, they can (note that word) do it. It's wise not to abuse this as they do have lives of their own.

4) Retainers: These NPCs are a PCs go to NPCs. They are their valets, drivers, managers, slaves, investigators. They work almost exclusively for the PC, if not outright. Almost each major template has a sub-class that act as perfect Retainer types (Ghouls for Vampires, Wolf-Blooded for Werewolves, Sleepwalker/Proximi, Fae-Touched for Changelings). This is the most ubiquitous of the Merits, and is also the most fun to roleplay with as you're effectively making a secondary character to assist you.

5) Familiars: Entities that are bonded to the PC. These include Familiar's of the Spirit Realm, the Ghosts of Twilight Realm (no, they do not sparkle...okay, some of them do), the Goetic Summonings of the Astral, Zombies, Hedge Beasts, Hedgespun Automata, etc, etc, etc. These are overtly supernatural entities and are usually beholden to esoteric rules that keep them in check.

As the Mage Storyteller, a venue that has ready access to nearly all of the realms, I have to deal with most of these types of Merits (barring the venue specific varieties). In my time as a player and as a Storyteller, I've seen these Merit Based NPCs used in two ways: Fully fleshed out concepts, and dots on a sheet. An example of Dots on a Sheet were my experiences with Jack on Duck Island. Jack was a consistently exasperated Retainer for the overly dramatic escapades of what was a Vampire Sitcom. Then I've run into it where someone goes "I have five dots of Allies, they're going to back me up" And that's that.


Can you guess which version I like better?

NPCs, as I've stated before, represent your setting. If you're playing a game that is based deeply on your settting and on themes, that will reflect in how these NPCs react to others. NPC based Merits is access to the Setting for aid and assistance. Further tying this down, NPCs are to be written by the storytelling staff, an aspect that is being hammered home a lot more closely than it was last chronicle. These are, for all intents and purposes, part of the setting.

This gets to be interesting as I've said before, Mage deals with creatures and characters on multiple Realms. Each one has their own flavor and their own sort of themes. The Spirit Realm is the most obvious of them, but the Astral has it's own David Lynchian quirks. I can't speak for other storytellers, I'm not them, but if I'm expected to write them and portray them, you'd better believe I'm adding Depth and Consequences to them. NPCs are not just functions to be used at the players convenience, they are the population of your game world. They react when you do a thing, they do things when you aren't even around. So while a PC's sheet has dots that denote access to them, that's exactly what it is: Access.

Things to keep in mind.

Later

One and Done: A look back

This week a year ago, I decided I was egotistical enough to think that people would want to read a blog on LARPing and gaming.

It was egotistical, but I've learned to cope with it.

A year into the lunacy that is Confessions of a Wrathful LARPer, I've learned several important things. I've learned about the GNS theory, how it works and how it doesn't. I've learned that my main goal in anything I do in this community is going to be based on telling a story as opposed to playing statistics or recreating a perfect simulation. That's my motivation in Role Play, to play a Role. In the future, I want to look at Method, How as a player and a storyteller that plays out, because as I've noticed, I use the limits of the Game to allow for Narrative to happen.

I also discovered the mad house that is Dystopia Rising. Bunch of fucking lunatics raiding the woods in the ass crack of night and torturing their players once a month, rain or shine. I've never been challenged to interact as a character for 36 hours, especially when sleep deprivation, the fear of the unknown, and the ability to not fuck up and die in the middle of the woods is a thing both in and out of game. The blog post I have of my first experience there is my most read article to date.

Love you guys. I'll be back soon, if I have to drown the entire forest in the blood and bile of those who get in my way, I will.

I've also discovered the love that is Nordic LARPing. I've not yet had the experience, but I want to take part in a Nordic Style game. I want to be challenged by being in the experience as far as I am allowed to and as far as I can take it.

The year has also shown me my limits in gaming. I'm not a social heavy character. I do not have the thought for social climbing or going out and making an impression. I am. And while we're exploring characters that are different from ourselves, it has to come from part of us. I don't have that part in me. I also learned my limit in terms of gaming, as I begin to take my break for the next couple of months.

I've met several other academically minded folk in the field. Shoshana Kessock, local game developer and fellow blogger added me onto her unless-someone-shows-me-better comprehensive LARP and Gaming reading material list . I've also met Peter Woodworth, a man who has written for and about role playing games than I ever will. I'm playing games WRITTEN by him. He's something of my celebratory crush on this list. I've also had the distinction of becoming acquainted with Dr. Sarah Lynne Bowman, whose book The Functions of Role-Playing Games is something along the lines of what I want to do with this blog eventually

I told you, I'm egotistical. And as I said, I've learned to cope.

In the end, writing this blog and the experience in LARPing made me a more insightful writer. Since I started Storytelling and writing, I've come up with story ideas that while weren't good for the games, could make good novels in and of themselves. I'm also in the midst of developing my own Boffer Larp with several of my friends. I've got a thousand ideas, and because of this thing, I want to share them.

As for what's to come, there are several articles I have in mind: Powergaming, the struggle between Function and Flavor in Character Building, and a look into Final Fantasy VII and it's affect on my gaming experience.

Thank you all for reading this, and I hope you stick around.

Later.

Stepping off the board: dealing with burnout

Last we spoke, I talked about post-con exhaustion. Well, after two weeks, the exhaustion hasn't left. Reading emails to do scenes is like reading mandatory memos from an employer. I look to this game weekend and, if not for the fact I have to run one of the games, I would just sleep through the whole fucking thing.

In short, kids, I'm burned out.

Burn Out, as my psychology lessons threatened to bash into my skull, is when the mind has attained a level of consistent exhaustion through present stressors. In this case, gaming.

Part of dealing with it is understanding the factors that went into it. The con probably didn't help. Don't get me wrong, loved every minute of it, but as I've noted before, I people out damn fast. That, plus a moment that hit one of my triggers (I've gotta do a topic on Triggers and Gaming at some point), just made last week a chore, and has just sucked the fun out of coming in this week.

Another factor are the PCs I'm portraying. Again as I've said before, I'm in the middle of trying to figure out where my PCs for Lost and Requiem are going. I've a plan for my lost PC, but in reality he has no footing to back himself up. This is what I get for making a special fucking snowflake character (I'm one of the only Directionals in play right now, period). He needs time to shore up his own resources and make himself ready, his focus is Honor and War. While it's Honorable to commit to an action, it's stupid to not have your own base of power or your own stores, or soldiers. So he's doing that for the time being in the distance.

My Requiem character was an experiment that did not end well. He was supposed to be a Socio/Political character. Here's the thing: Craig isn't socio/political, and it was boring the fuck out of me. Also, the person with whom my PC was attached to as attache' and bodyguard is GREAT at  the socio/political, so there's a need to alter the dynamic of my PC, but there was no real opening or impetus for it.

And to be frank, I'm 27 years old, single, currently unemployed and LARPing is a hobby that can consume your real life if you let it.

So, when you've come to this point, you do what's natural: You step back, recharge, regroup, plan and come back at a later time. In my hopes, I'd like to come back in December, as it's my third year anniversary with the Club and Live Action Roleplay in general. But I'm not going to stress it, I'll come back when it's both good for me and my characters to come back, they'll still be doing stuff, but they're off the board for now.

I would like to note that this doesn't mean I'll stop blogging. I've still got a game to run and ideas to confront, so the blogging will continue until morale improves. Since this is my morale, the Blogging will just continue.

Later,

Goals And Assessing Goals in LARP

It's month Five for the new Chronicle of stories in Mind's Eye Society. Tensions are raised, alliances made, drama unfolding. And then there are the character interactions. *insert snare drum*

If this were TV, by this point into a season I'm starting to look and see what threads are starting to form, what arcs are beginning to build. I'm debating to see if the show itself has merit or not as time goes by. While LARPing isn't TV, there is definitely an episodic element to it as we meet and gather every month and most of us storytellers run with our personal themes and arcs. So as I assess the new chronicle lineup, I start looking more towards my characters and what they've got going on.

Not much, from the looks of it.

In Lost, my PC Jin is in a fit of dire straits as the Seasonal Courts (which he used to be a part of) are growing more and more erratic in their actions, which are leading to an increasing worry from the Directional Courts (which he is now one of the rulers of). It's a bit difficult to express this, because he's West Court, he's Honor and Warfare. His first notions are to try and maintain or rolling in and shooting shit. He's also in a position in which his backup is non-existent. The Directional Courts, minus Jin, are all NPCs. That means that most of the Directional Courts gusto falls on me and Jin to deliver to the other players. So I have a goal there, but how do I go about doing it? Do I just back away and build up my resources to make sure that when the West Court is needed, it won't just be me on my loansome? Or do I throw in with the others and basically go against my PC's principles? At this point, due to the drama, Jin is almost forced to the sidelines as anything would be a breach of his position and his code.

In Requiem, Owen was meant to be a go between between the founders of his House and the rest of Kindred Society. Most of the Founders have taken a more hands on approach, which I expected, but it does relegate Owen into more of a 'gopher' position that isn't congruent with his other abilities and talents. This is a problem I and the players of the founders are aware of, but right now Owen doesn't have much to do other than sit with the Founders until Shit Happens and then deal with it. Craig, while grateful for the not running around, enjoys chasing plot every now and then. Requiem's plot so far as been the High Castle intrigue, which is something I as a person am not great with at all. In the Game of Thrones, I'm Samwell fucking Tarly and I always wanted to be a wizard. There is really nothing that is investing him (and really, me, for that matter) in the venue.

This is generally a problem I have with my characters. What are their goals? What are their plans for getting them. LARPing is about people interacting in their own private stories and agendas, at least that's how I've always seen it. My guys don't have those in any concrete sense.

Part of me thinks that this comes from my beliefs as a writer. I'm what Brandon Sanderson (dear god, that man needs to write his shit down into a textbook for fantasy writers) calls a Discovery Writer. Discovery Writers have broad ideas and then they just write. Stephen King is notorious for it (it shows) and I tend to do it very often. I don't usually have these long drawn out outlines of my PCs, I literally make some of this up on the fly. I didn't realize that my Lost PC last Chronicle, Declan, was Bi until he was approached by someone for a casual encounter. I knew Jacob Rude had brothers and sisters in Dystopia Rising, but until pressed I didn't know if he was the eldest or not (he wasn't). I enjoy discovering bits and pieces about my characters, but I also realize that when you're in a social based game, where you can literally make an impact without ever having a sheet, that puts you at a disadvantage.

So what do we do? This is a question I'm asking you, folks, cuz I'm fresh out of ideas. That's not true. The first thing to do is to figure out your PC's priorities. What matters to them. This is easier for me to decide with Jin, as he has the most to gain through conflict between the various Courts, having been apart of one Freehold, a Sovereign of another, and friends with the third. Jin has knives in every direction and he's one of the only people who actually sees the game in terms of The City and not The Freeholds. For those of you playing the home game, this probably puts Jin on the Martyr track, which can be totally fun to work with if we can work with it. What are the challenges to that, what are the ways we can make that work, how could it fail?

Owen is more difficult. What does he want? He wants his family alive. Okay, that's great, and as a Shadow Assassin he can do it pretty easy. But that doesn't make him a character, he's a function. I could proxy his sheet in to game and have that taken care of without needing to be there (I have an article in mind in regards to this). He's the challenge. I want to build him up as a better occultist, for when the inevitable blood magic/weird shit plots start happening, Owen can go "I need three gallons of pigs blood, a bundle of dead rhododendrons and a plunger...DON'T THINK, JUST GET THEM."

So that's where I'm at. Really, this is the part where the Storytellers should be talked to, as they are there to help plug in the PCs into the story (and the story into the PCs sometimes). It's the running gag where a player comes up to his Storyteller and says "My PC has nothing to do!" And that's usually when something awful happens that starts the ball on some evil plot. A previous Requiem Storyteller was notorious for this, as players brought it up and then sicced NPCs on them as experiments. So sooner or later, that discussion will happen. Until then,

Later

The Wrath of Con, playing, Storytelling, and connecting at NERE 2013

Picture if you will: It's 10:30 am on Monday August 26th. I've just woken up from a 14 hour sleep. I've no real desire to leave the comfort of my room for the near future.

Con-drop, ladies and gents (and all points aside)

This weekend was NERE, the Mind's Eye Society's NorthEast Regional Convention. MES is broken up into small regional clusters, with the NorthEast comprising of New York and every other state along the eastern coastal united states until the Canadian border folk ask to see your passport. The region has their own Coordinator and Storyteller staff, uniting the club's organization and giving their stories a sense of continuity throughout the region, seeding plot from National.

Every other year, the Region holds a convention. Everyone in the area (and quite a few outside of it) get together and game for a weekend. This was my first convention for the club. I should add that I was there on the grace and goodwill of my friends Greg and Margaret, who frankly shouldn't have been that awesome, but I love them anyways.

This is how the convention went, broken down by day.

Thursday:

The convention took place in Seekonk Massachusetts, which is several minutes away from the Rhode Island border. It was remarkably larger than it first appeared, going deeper than I had anticipated. The entire ballroom area was marked off for us, registration of both convention goers and their characters were taking place in the usual mad rush of "OH MY GOD WE PLANNED FOR THIS AND THERE IS STILL MADNESS AROUND". I got my two characters, my Vampire and Changeling, registered. I was given my staff pass (I was storytelling for one of the games) and set along my merry way.

Before games began, our (Greg, Margret and I) friends Jillian and John arrived. Jilly gave me a beautiful journal to continue my writing projects. Folks, journals are like gold and sex to me, I have developed a massive addiction to writing in them for various projects and anyone who purchases one for me is immediately and automatically gets this reaction from me:

                                   

Thursday night was dedicated to Vampire The Requiem. I play Owen Asteria, member and guard/assistant/Elder Wrangler for House Asteria. As such, Owen doesn't chase plot so much as he interacts with the other players, mostly the Asteria themselves as most are either political plot chasers or bug fuck nuts monsters. So it was refreshing to meet players not part of the family or New York. I got to meet members off the DC court and members of the Circle of the Crone, a Covenant of Vampires who believe in embracing their nature in the tradition of various pagan rites. The highlight came when a bunch of bloodspattered ghouls came in and Owen's grandsire (the woman who made Owen a vampire was made by this vampire) wanted a taste. This was clearly a mistake and a trap, one of Owen's Aunts stepped between his grandsire and the ghouls while Owen (gently) placed his hand on his shoulder. Long story short, when the ghouls sprung a trap, Owen and his Aunt jettisoned his grandsire out of the way. Owen, at the very least did his job.

The night ended with a meeting of the attending Acolytes. Most of whom were female, which reminded me a lot of the Women in LARP post I put up about a month or so back. These were powerful figures within the area, all women. Out of Game, these were all geeks enjoying the fuck out of themselves and the game they were in.

Friday

Friday started rough. During the evening I had triggered severely (alcohol and lots of people will do that to me) and so I did not sleep. I repeat: I did not sleep. So after an early round of breakfast and availing myself of the pool, I slipped into my Changeling character and made my way down to game.

I play Jin, a member of the West Court, an asian based Court that focuses on Honor and War You'd be surprised and amazed at how little that Court gets represented in game (not aided by the fact that the Western Eurpean based Seasonal Court is given more focus by the National clubs despite the fact that New York has access to hundreds of diverse cultures). I was it's only member present. My friend Abby ran the game and had myself and the Diurnal Kings (the Day and Night Courts) acts as judges for the other courts antics.

It was a fun game, mostly meeting interesting people. I just wasn't into it and by the end of game I wished to drop out. I didn't have any other game to play that night, as I was set to run Mage the next morning. I visited the charity auction and picked up a Mage prop juju bag for myself (and my players...maybe). The auction was nothing if not hilarious as Jeremy, a former New York player was performing the role of MC and Roastmaster of the entire audience. I hadn't laughed that hard in week.


After that and my friends Margaret and Stan availed ourselves of the pool. It was probably one of the best parts of the entire experience. As I've written in other posts, I find dealing people to be a draining experience and I find groups to be a fucking nightmare at times as a result. Sitting around relaxing with two people I know and am comfortable with was as refreshing as the hour nap I got beforehand. The night ended quietly with only minor bits of drama (which all ended happily, thanks god) strung about.

The next day was Mage. Now, as some of you will remember from previous posts, I get anxiety during games I run for people I play and speak with on a regular basis. Now I'm playing in an unknown environment for god knows how many people I've never really met.

Nervous? Nah. I was motherfucking petrified.

Add to that that the person who was going to play my star NPC had to step down and one of my assistant had become a plot cookie for the Accord venue's game which was running across from us. I was ready to crawl into a hole for a while. But I had the support of Margaret and Stan (I told you, I'm comfortable with them and that goes a long way) and Jared, who helped with combat and immediately made himself awesome to my eye.

The mage game was thus: An archmaster, someone whose abilities with magic has in fact allowed them to leave our reality and enter the otherwise closed realms of magic came back to this plane to ask for assistance. I was given permission by the national storyteller for Mage to use the otherwise unusable archmaster and the use of real, honest-to-christ Time Travel. So I took the players to the site of Occupy Wall Street in October of 2011. They discovered the attacks of protesters by Tremere Liches, soul hunting mages, they also discovered a connection to an even bigger conspiracy of liches that ties in to National Plot.

In the end, it went by smoothly and five hours went by in a flash. I was told by some of the players that it was one of the only games where time travel was used in a non-bullshit way and that everything tied itself off nice and neatly. People enjoyed it, they liked my style and I've already received contact from players afterwards for downtimes in New York City.

After that was dinner with the Asteria family. Having home cooked Italian food was a welcomed treat and was also good bonding time, we went from there directly to the Requiem game as the whole family was (with the exception of one) entirely present. It was fun, but my heart wasn't into it. I left early to slip into comfortable clothes and prep for the party that happened afterwards. Sunday was spent packing and prepping for the ride home, we were all exhausted and done.

In the end, I had a lot of fun. I've mentioned it before, I don't do well with groups of people,  don't feel like I make much of an impression and I feel drowned out in the noise. While that certainly felt true (note that word: felt) I had an amazing time and felt welcomed and appreciated by friends new and old alike. I am however supremely burned out, and I think a break is called for. I need to recharge my batteries and prepare for the next big adventure.

I thank you all who I met this weekend, and all who put up with my ST-Induced Anxiety attacks. I love you all,

Later.


                                                    

I got bored and did a thing

An Introverts Perspective on LARPing

Friday nights are sometimes the best and worst times for gaming.

Changeling is one of those games that are highly popular, highly fun and completely packed with people. It's been three months since the chronicle started and we've just finished the game for August. Everyone had a great time, a lot of political plot was going on and my character, Jin, was handling a lot of it. It was fun, a lot of work, but by the time we got out of the game, I had crashed.

Let me explain what I mean by that. When I say Crash, I mean that I had hit the point of emotional exhaustion where I could feel myself being angrily irritated at the people around me, simply for being there. I felt that having the 30+ players near me was too many in the room. I felt suffocated, with too many voices around me. I bolted towards the diner we go to after game to get a Coke and calm me down. I drank my drink, tried to maintain some conversation then paid my check and left to grab my bus back up to the Bronx.

As I made my way to the bus, I put my headphones on, trying to tune out the world as much as I could while I tried to put some kind of control on my emotions, my heart and mind racing with dozens of feelings and thoughts which can be separated into two groups: inadequacy and the need to be alone. I woke up this morning feeling emotionally and physically drained. My body didn't want to move. I felt hungover without ever taking a drop of liquor.

This also occurred at the Last Dystopia Rising game. By the end of Saturday night, I didn't want to have to deal with anyone. I scurried back into my darkened Barn (and nearly broke my shins on an ill placed bench, ow) and cocooned myself into my sleeping bag. I woke up sunday and went "...Nope, not even trying today." And spent that morning sweeping out the barn, doing so in character on the odd moment someone came in. But my heart wasn't into it, I just didn't have the energy to interact.

You see, I'm an introvert. In the end of things, I need to have some sort of quiet, private space where I am alone with just the voices in my own head to talk. I like not having to talk to people sometimes, I like that I can just coast and enjoy the experience for myself. There was a piece that explains how introverts act and how to handle them, in that Introverts need private and personal space to recharge energy, and that the need for silence and privacy shouldn't be scene as an insult. (the piece is here)

So this becomes a question of "How the fuck can I LARP?" LARPing is, by it's sheer definition, a Social game where people interact with one another. How does that work when, eventually, I just don't want to have to deal with people and just do some of my own work or just not have to deal. I see in LARPs, especially theatre/salon LARPs where (seemingly) extraverted players tend to be the most effective/popular of the players because they thrive in social settings and situations, which makes introverted players have to work just a little bit harder to make as much of an impact. So how does this work?

 I have a few ideas, and I'd like to share them.

I should note that I am only speaking for myself. You are not me, I am not you. My experiences aren't the same as other peoples and I do not presume to have any/all of the answers. If I did have all the answers, I'd just lie down and shut up. If this does help you, great, if it doesn't, then let this poor nerd espouse to himself before the men in white coats drag his loopy ass away.

The first thing that should be done is to be aware of your limits, know when you're hitting the line where you can't deal. This is key and primary. I've had moments where I just cannot put up with being in a room full of people and I didn't notice it. I get panicky and I lash out pretty hard, it's not something I'm particularly fond of. So I recognize the warning signs, low energy, sharp spike of emotions. It manifests itself sometimes through my Roleplay, which considering my character in Changeling is part of the West Court, which focuses on Honor and Warfare, it's not out of the question for him to be stressed and ready to strike. The problem comes when the line gets crossed from roleplay enhancement to real life issue. .

Now, what happens when you've hit your limit for the day? My first thing is to just back away, step out of the game and give yourself the space you need. This is easier done in theatre and salon style where going out of character is just a matter of stepping out of the game space to find a quiet corner or go downstairs for a can of Coke or a smoke. In games that focus on deeper immersion, like Dystopia Rising, it's a bit difficult because Everywhere is game space. As much as I need my personal space, I'm not one to go out of character to do so at the cost of other players fun, hence why I usually withdraw to my sleeping space and just crash a bit, maybe do some In Character writing (most of my characters write, are any of you surprised by this?). I'm still IC, but I'm doing so at minimum. 

But, what if you still want to play? What if you still want to do something with your character during that time. This is where you should go to the Storytellers for some help. Most of my characters are, as I've said before, support characters. They investigate, they craft, they heal. They aren't normally frontline characters and rarely ever do they have to be up front and center. So it's not at all out of the question that they'll do work in the background and still be useful. This relies on certain factors, 1) How tired are you. 2) Does your ST have something for you to do, this may require waiting for them, which depending on when during the night this happens, it may not be feasible. 3) Some games may not be designed for someone to go do a private scene. If these answers are 1) Very 2) they are unavailable to do a private scene or 3) the game is not designed to do a low interaction private scene then see yourself at the Withdraw option. I do believe that this is something that SHOULD be brought up to an ST though, so they are aware and can accomodate. A player should not be denied the ability to play just because they aren't feeling up to playing the main room.

I should note that this isn't saying that introverts shouldn't play social characters. That's a stupid statement, but I feel that, if you're someone like me who has a breaking point on dealing with people, you need to be comfortable and aware that there is a limit to the amount of interaction you can physically tolerate.

Another suggestion is to do something to destress after game, for me this is using the time it takes me to get home from Manhattan to the Bronx (usually about an hour or so trip) to play music or an ASMR track to take me out of the emotional funk and to allow myself to relax and calm down. I also recommend reading, putting in movies, just something that you yourself can enjoy and can bring yourself to a good equilibrium.  Hell, this blog is a way to do that, to express my emotions and thoughts in a somewhat constructive manner while clacking away at my keyboard in my house. It helps me deal and focus those emotions while also recharging my batteries.

This of course goes adds to the fact that I myself am a storyteller. We're a smaller game, with a more focused plot and more diverse mechanic, I've got gamers that range from the casual to the "I wanna make a truck with nothing but Matter". The above suggestions aren't options for an ST. For four/five hours I'm on the hook, and I owe it to my players to not jump out of a window to have a moment of silence to myself. But the moment that game is done, I pack up my bags and grab something to eat and head on home, because I'm tapped, drain, and I am sufficiently low on spoons.

It's not easy, doing this. But, it's worth it. I'm out playing with a group of people I adore, creating stories and for a few hours at a stretch living out those stories. It's worth the exhaustion and it's worth the effort.

Later.